Permission 110 Talk # XIV (transcript)

Welcome to 110 Talk.

This is episode number 14.

I'm so glad that I decided to distribute content in this format and I think we always need more podcasts, more YouTube channels, more songs of people who are putting out authentic messages.

Welcome to October.

There's a lot of different ways that we can look at the calendar.

And by most definitions of the Western calendar, it's like October is Q4. We have a final Q4 stretch - for anyone that works in sales, that can mean, okay, we got to hunker down. We got to get our sales this year because Q4 is how the investors will track the outcome of this year. I have a lot of memories of that.

Another way to think about it, I actually just learned this recently looking at my paper calendar, but I think it was the end of September, the New Year started in the Jewish traditions, in the Jewish world. And I think that's beautiful too.

There's a lot of different ways to look at the calendar.

One thing is for certain is that October 31st is Halloween and the marks the holiday season starting in the West.

So as we dig into today's topic, I want to say happy Q4, happy Jewish New Year, happy whatever is going on in your life.

Today's topic is why do we ask for permission as humans. They say that we're the smartest animals on the planet. We're the smartest creature in existence. But we're the only ones that seek approval to live our best lives. Think of about it. Do animals in the jungle or even in our cities, these birds that I hear outside, these cats and raccoons that I see in the street, do they ask for permission from their superiors perceived or otherwise, to go after their prey, to live how they know they will thrive?

I think not.

As humans, our conditioning starts very young. Of course, we have our parents. Even as we get into the classroom, we have to ask for permission for as much as using the restroom.

It is something that is ingrained so deep into our society, this idea of asking permission, that even as we grow up and we develop our talents and our skills and our visions, we are still having this memory, almost like muscle memory, of asking for permission.

We follow unspoken rules and ask for permission when we don't even need to. In the schools, it continues by the tests and the quizzes that happen in the classroom. A lot of times those tests and those quizzes are not about learning. It's about memorizing. It's about obedience to the system.

The truth is that life doesn't work like that. We can take as many classes as we want. We can get as many degrees as we want. But life doesn't work like a test or a pop quiz. In life, you have to come with your armor, whatever is available to you. You have have to respond in the moment of what's happening on the ground. And I think this is how instinctual animals who don't ask for permission operate.

They very much are in the moment deciding what they need and they go out and they take it for survival and beyond, for thriving and being the kings of the kingdom.

This need to ask for permission is present in families in the patriarch. I make the money. I make the decisions. We need to ask for permission for allowance or for whatever it is that we need.

In corporate structures , I am all too familiar with this as well. I think that one of the best quotes that is out there, and maybe it's underutilized, is "don't ask for permission, but ask for forgiveness". It's an old adage and I'm convinced we don't use it enough.

I can speak to how this operates in sales because sales is about numbers. Numbers is a language that humans understand. And a lot of times in corporate America, it's like, 'well, as long as you post the numbers and you get the sale, then sometimes the ends justify the means', as long as you're not hurting anyone or breaking any laws.

Arguably , I would say there's even a comparison in the music world. We all read these headlines about, oh, X artist sue's Y artist for lyrics or for melody or for copying some component of a song. But the truth with that is that nobody cares until a song blows up. So I could copy parts, and for the record, I have never copied any melody or lyric to my knowledge and any similarities, just like they say in the movie disclaimers to real life, are strictly coincidence.

But people do not care until there's numbers involved, until there's money involved. That's when the lawsuits come out. And so there is this correlation between permission is definitely not needed as long as there's no numbers, but after the numbers, that's where you got to get more careful because that's when the lawsuits come out.

That's when the sharks come out. That's just how things operate. There is money at stake and there is money that can be sued for. So that's when people come after with their lawsuits.

Human power, as we understand it, is built on control.

This is not my opinion or how I operate .

When I think about power, I think about empowering others. But so many structures of this world have wielded power as control over human beings. And the way that they enforce that power is trying to make people think that they need permission to do something or they need the one at the top to validate them. Or they need an elite group to back them.

And that is just false. That is a false narrative.

Money is also weaponized in this way. It's like money is like the carrot that they dangle at the end of the stick, right? It's like, oh, that promotion or that next job or that next opportunity is going to come with this money. This is our carrot on the stick. In our own minds, when we think about the future and it's like think about our dream life or our American dream, the big house, the 2.5 children, the white picket fence. These things are positioned as an end goal when really they are just things. They're just tangible things. I'm not saying they don't have a place in life or they have no value, but they are things that are not end things because trust me, you cannot take them with you when you leave this planet.

The other way that money is sometimes weaponized and this is in corporate power structures mostly, but also you could argue in government or even with investors if you're starting a business and you're trying to get funding - it's like you need to obey these rules or be fired, miss out on the job, miss out on the opportunity, miss out on the funding.

I do think there are beautiful laws that have been written in our time. The most prominent example that I keep coming back to is laws around driving. We want to keep the road safe. We want to be able to co-create safe driving experiences for everyone. And that's why there's speed limit. And driver's tests and all of that .

Actually, side note, in my own history is when I changed my name, I had to go get a new license and I was not expecting that I would have to take a new test because I've been licensed since I was 16 years old. But I had to go in there and take these tests and I actually failed it the first two times. I failed the test because I was like, oh, I know how to drive. I can do this. I don't need to study. But it was very specific about, how many feet before the light do you have to put your turn signal on - and all these details that you don't think about when you're driving because you're actually doing it.

Overall, I think there are good laws such as the ones related to driving that are designed to protect the public.

And I think that there can be more good laws that are created to protect the public, to protect the planet, and to actually encourage activities that lead to evolution of humans and lead to better stewardship of our planet.

And, of course, the politicians talk about these things like renewable energy, tax credits, which actually really can work. I think when we promote renewable energy or energy efficiency in the products that we make, that should have a tax incentive, for example. I think that we can come up with all kinds of things that are helpful in this moment, given the current moment that we are living in.

The truth is that we don't need permission to come up with these ideas or to create these products. Nobody in power is going to want to hear them unless it comes from them. It's co-created with them.

We have to act without permission, especially when it relates back to the greater good and building the greater good.

So I'm here to tell you that you do not need permission to do whatever it is that you want to do.

If you want to start your own podcast, start your own fucking podcast.

Do it. Now or whenever the timing is right for you, not from somebody else.

If you are writing a song, you do not need anybody's permission to do it to record it, and you don't need any approval from anyone in the industry in order to put it out into the world.

If you're thinking of doing a painting or a YouTube channel or maybe you're a more technical person and you're building some of your own code, I would encourage you to put it out even if it's not perfect because it's about starting somewhere and building on that and then coming into contact with other people who can support and uplift your vision.

And it may look hard.

They may make it look hard to achieve the success that you are trying to achieve .

But the truth is that we only need one win.

We need one win to build momentum and everything after that can build on itself.

So to say that we don't need permission is not to degrade anybody else's work.

It's not to say that the things that are out there are not great already because some of them absolutely are.

But it's knowing that you are enough right now without having to get anybody's permission to do anything that is for the greater good.

And I want to remind us of a passage from the Bible and this is one of my favorites.

It's one of so many people's favorites because it is constantly quoted.

And I think it's constantly quoted for a reason.

This is Galatians 6:9.

It says, "so let us not grow weary in doing what is right for we will reap at harvesting time if we do not give up."

And that is the key, is not giving up.

People will try to brand something that you do that that doesn't get visible momentum as a failure, but it's not true.

All that they're trying to do in that is to discourage you.

And I've been through this a lot.

People have mocked, discouraged , all kinds of sabotage on the work that I was putting out. But I don't take my judgment from them.

My judgment comes from only one.

And I want you to know that any human being that judges you when you're doing honest, good work with integrity does not matter.

If anything, they might just be fueling the conversations about you. And it can work for you in different ways.

So make your website.

Write your song or screenplay .

Start your YouTube, write a book.

Whatever it is that you want to create, the world actually needs it, not only your skills and your talents, but also your story because people can see themselves in your story.

And it is so important that we have different voices, different faces, different backgrounds.

This is how we build a planet of evolution.

And again, if you're craft threatens them, they might try to hold back opportunities, switch algorithms, send shade your way, do anything that they can to make you doubt yourself.

But just remember Galatians 6:9 and know that there are other people out there that are on your side.

And I am definitely one of them.

I want to end this by saying, you are beautiful .

You are brilliant, and you have so much inside of you that the world needs.

And the spaces that I occupy, whether it be online or in person or wherever we happen to connect, I always try to promote a spirit of uplifting other people and being around other people that will uplift me because the negative energy out there is toxic and it is very, very real.

So if you do not take anything else away from this, I want you to remember that you are brilliant and you are beautiful and the dreams that you have in your mind, you can build them.

And I am your ally.

With that being said, I want to wish you a wonderful Q4, New Year, holiday season, however you see it in your own life and - from me to you, love and light.